A whole lotta love

Being home has been very good to me.  The drama and anxiety that I thought it would bring has not knocked on the door yet.  Well, maybe there has been a little drama tapping but I'm dealing with it in a completely different way which is by mostly saying, "That's their business" and not making it my own.  And when it comes down to it, underneath the bitterness and maw maw (my papa's term for drama), it's all somehow rooted in love.  Whether that be love coming out in the form of concern or love being so new and overwhelming and exciting that it causes people to lose their minds a little.  Or if the love means letting someone go and just being thankful for them either way, there's still some good in that.  So focusing on that has made everything much more positive and acceptable. 

Our recent series at church is called Love Revolution which is all about learning how to accept others and love our neighbors and really learn to love God.  And understanding and accepting that not only does God love us, he likes us.  The fact that someone could love my narcissistic and control freak self is someone worth giving credit to.  And if you think about it, you can't cut corners or hide anything with God.  And he's still cool with everything he sees.  Kind of like a dog; a dog is loyal and loves you no matter what you do.  (Maybe I just lost my ticket to Heaven by comparing God to a dog...pray for me please).  Being freed from condemnation spiritually has allowed me to be free from condemning myself and others.  Which circles back to the happiness I've found here at home.   And people think we're all closed minded country club christians...

Not having any real shopping or fast food places (we have a BK) has given me much more time to eat healthy and save money and enjoy the very basic and beautifully created things.  A friend came to visit last week and when he walked outside at night I told him to look up to which he exclaimed, "Wow!"  The patch of sky in the backyard has the perfect view of the stars.  It made me very proud of our little place in the middle of nowhere.  He also says the grass is greener here.  Probably because it's fertilized with chicken poo. 

And speaking of animals...showing work at the MH has given me an opportunity to create a piece for someone.  She's commissioned me to draw one of her horses.  Great, I thought, that shouldn't be too difficult.  A nine by eleven sketch.  Wrong.  A four foot by four foot canvas which will include a little bit of painting.  Yikes- painting raises my blood pressure.  I'm a little intimidated but I've got these neighbors to look at and draw inspiration from:

They've been getting spoiled with apples and nose scratches.

A picture of this sweet little cat, Baby, who has taken up residence on the back porch.

And last but not least, the newest and greatest little love, Cedar.

Cedar was born on December 1st and was a surprise birthday gift from Mama.  She did good.  I think it was love at first sight for me.  He's currently sleeping on my foot as I write this and it takes everything I have not to scoop him up and smother him with kisses.  I tell him all day how cute and handsome he is so he'll probably be a very egocentric adult. 

Henry and Waggles mostly bark and jump around him but I think in doggy code that means they love him.

Study buddy.